If I were ever to pursue science I would most certainly want to hook up with the jokers at the National Institutes of Health Animal Center in Maryland. Apparently getting monkeys s-faced on moonshine is not only good for giggles, it's also beneficial to humankind for some reason or another.
@Ripped: We all know you could drink those little macaque monkeys under the table, but you're feces throwing needs a lot of work.