what you need to do is stop using such mechanical dithering and using such close colours, i suggest you use a pallette from a piece thats 5-15 colours and see what happens, and for what youre trying to achieve, dont put dithering at all, just try making it cell shaded, kinda like a anime. never put black lines either dont put them at all, or just replace them with youre darkest colour of the hue your using(hue is the colour e.g. orange, green, brown)
Try varying line widths and using AA, right now, you have that very undesirable 1 pixel black line.
For your shading, try not to pillowshade, and give it more volume and contrast. With these colors, you could have just as well left it solid, the dithering isn't even visible.
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