TV Show Quotes :: Family Guy Quotes

If you want an autograph right now, you either got to give me a pen or some snow.

What are you gonna make me do? Whack a guy? Off a guy? Whack off a guy? 'Cause I'm married.

Make like Siamese twins and split ... and then one of you die.

Excuse me sir, I believe you're in my seat and I had sex with your mother.

Tom: "In local news, we have more on the approach of Hurricane Rupaul as it makes his or her way up the coast.
Let's go live to Ollie Williams with the BlaccuWeather report. Ollie?"

Ollie:"IT'S RAININ' SIDEWAYS."

Tom:"Sounds rough Ollie, Do you have an umbrella?"

Ollie:"Had one!"

Tom:"Where is it?"

Ollie:"Inside out two miles away!"

Tom:"Is there anything we can do for you?"

Ollie:"Bring me some soup!"

Tom:"What kind?"

Ollie:"Chunky!!"

Tom: "All right, we'll get right on that."